How do you know if your expectations are too high or if other people’s are too low?
Since I’ve been unemployed for some time, I have had a lot of questions. Not only why it’s so hard for someone to get an entry-level job around this time of year in New York City of all cities, the busiest city of them all but why people have become so anti-social in some aspects. But at the same time, they act like they’re doing stuff all day long on Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram.
I know I should not focus so much or any of my attention on these things. But as harsh as it seems, it kills me inside to think that some of these people who I have to share space and oxygen on the earth with are such selfish, careless individuals.
I want to be the change I wish to see.
I want to be upbeat and happy, do all the things I’ve ever hoped and dreamed of, hopefully with someone I love as well.
I can’t find the love inside myself to do it and move forward.
I don’t know how to find today’s peace.
I’m looking for my group of people who make my heart sing and every time I think I’m on my way towards that people remind me how terrible they are and I just want to quit.
It has nothing to do with money either. Oddly enough, I was happy when I made bullshit money at my job that I worked at night after coming home from classes. I loved the grind. Keeping myself busy.
I hate when people get mad at me for sharing my opinion and claim that I’m shaming someone else’s.
No, you just don’t like or agree with my opinion. Be upfront jack-off.
On the other hand, there’s a difference between someone being shamed for their opinion and someone saying something completely ridiculous or off-putting and hurting to people.
I am young but I have heard and read almost everything terrible possible. People are not begging for ‘safe spaces,’ they’re asking for human decency.
If America as a country has taught me anything, it’s that I have the right to say what I want but I also have to deal with the repercussions of stating my opinion. I do not have any problem with a person or group of people even, disagreeing with my opinion. What I dislike, is people just replying with their opinion instead of trying to listen to differing points and views and learning why someone thinks with that perspective.
I want to do something that makes me happy, meet people who I automatically click with and we can talk all day and night and hang out whenever. I personally do not like depending on people for anything but I do not want to feel like I am depending on people when I go to them with my feelings either.
I have been getting so bored and frustrated since I have been home looking for jobs, maybe partly cynical because of a bad experience I had with a job I thought was different than it turned out to be.
I used to love going on walks around my neighborhood and to the beach by me but it has become so awkward. I feel like people are looking at me like what the fuck is she doing using her legs outside? Legitimately. You’re not walking to your car? Or walking some place to eat? People are so strange and so basic at the same time.
I want to hang out and have fun with amazing, outstanding people who care about more than themselves and are okay sharing their opinion while also being okay listening to others endlessly.
I will end this post with a quote from someone (one of many) who inspires me. Suck it if you don’t like it!
Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. – Barack Obama
For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been contemplating what I want to do with the rest of my life.
The answer: I’d love to create.
Film, art, maybe in the future act or write a play. But before I get ahead of myself, I need some slight inspiration from you all. I have some ideas in my mind. But I’d really like to know what you all would be interested in.
What genres of film are your favorites? Do people watch shorts that aren’t your average funny video on YouTube? Honest question.
One idea that I’ve been throwing around in my mind, is a film with a female villain. I’m unsure of her name so far. She meets this girl Daisy, who has been struggling to find herself. And she’s really struck by Daisy’s honesty.
I’m thinking of naming the film Spark. You’ll see why if you’re interested.
I’m so tired of seeing all the same films about all the same things. Or films that are simply an escape from reality, without trying to add something better to reality. Beyond documentaries, not many mainstream films address struggles of your average person.
Daisy is a sweet girl who tries to see the best in everything and everyone. She truly wants to make the world a better place. But she’s unsure how. She hasn’t had the best family upbringing, has always felt bitterness from her mother, stepdad and sister, but she appreciates everything she has been through regardless.
What I need is a motivation for her character. What wakes her up in the morning? What wakes you up in the morning? What’s going to take this sensitive woman from wanting to stay inside all the time, from doing the complete opposite?
My struggles right now are very close to Daisy’s.
I want to start a conversation. What do you think? What do you feel? I’m here for you. Inspire me, like I hope to inspire you all.
From where did they come
The ego and the mind
Working together as one
This isn’t who we are
Or what we should believe The negative thoughts The ego wanting to deceive
Step back for one moment And watch them from afar
See the pain and fear dissolve Those thoughts not who we are
For we are infinite beings
Find stillness from within
The mind stops us from seeing
It can change the world we’re in We are not our thoughts
Nor are we formed From the ego and the mind
Our reality is torn Watch the thoughts that come
And recognize why they are there
But be aware, they’re ego born For your life they do not care
But once you see them for all they are They have no power over you
Watch them come and watch them go With practice they’ll come few
You’re waking up now to beauty To the things you’ve never heard The waterfall, the mountains
The silence between the birds
So I had to share this, because I thought it was so fun. Often on google, they feature things that you can look at for that day.
Apparently today is World Emoji Day! So, google gave girls the chance to code an emoji that’s “unique like you”
With the limited amount of options given for hair colors and styles, this is a bit of an exaggeration to say. Still, I applaud them for their effort.
As you can see somewhat below, they give you options for customizing the eyes, mouth along with other options. The face and hair, which are both selected when you choose a name. I chose the Lily character for the second emoji I made. Which is shown below:
The process is a little confusing until you do everything yourself. I got the hang of it once I played around with all of the options. Other customization choices include a hat like the flower crown shown, an outfit (the one shown here is listed in the drop down menu as a Rockstar jacket) and tool (an example being the artist’s pallet and glasses) I chose two tools because I happen to also have glasses.
I’m not sure if Google has done a lot of promotions for this website. But I definitely think it deserves a lot more attention than it probably gets. I’m glad that I stumbled upon it while online.
Ladies, if you want to do the same and make some personalized emojis click the link:
Sorry guys 😥 I’m a tad sad to say this option is only available for girls, but I think the point of this website is to get girls/women to code more, so don’t get too sad about it. If you still want to make some girl ones in the comfort of your own home, I am not judging or stopping you. Can’t say the same for others 😛
Both of my creations are below:
Emoji created by Nicole Oliva using madewithcode.com a website designed by Google.
Emoji created by Nicole Oliva using madewithcode.com a website designed by Google.
I am definitely not being paid by Google to talk about this, and the Gaff Blog does not do business with Google. If someone would like to pay me, be my guest lmao.
I wanted to practice what I preach and share my OOTD, which includes my favorite t-shirt.
I can’t lie and say I haven’t struggled with finding myself and just accepting myself for everything that I am. When I saw this shirt from Studio Mucci [bystudiomucci.com] (I bought it last year), it struck a chord in me.
I don’t have to figure out who I am. I create who I am. People see who you are by every move you make. Every word you say, or don’t say. I realized then and there I would focus on myself and making myself happy and forget about what everyone else thinks. Which is honestly where the problem lied. I knew who I was all along. I was simply hesitant to be myself.
Hope you enjoy my OOTD (styled this with some jeans to go to work).
What’s your OOTD? Or do you have an experience to share?
Show some love by liking, sharing and comment about your experience.
Be yourself. Don’t hesitate. Do.