When I Say I’m a Feminist

When I Say I’m a Feminist

When I say I’m a Feminist

It has nothing to do with a hate for men 

When I say I’m a Feminist

It’s not because my dad chose not to see me as a child 

When I say I’m a Feminist

It’s not because of the latent patriarchy that is so evident to me, but not clear to people that say “you’re so lucky to live in America, what are you complaining about?” when I already knew this to be true, I come from a family that supports and has ties to the military and have never said I was not lucky. I have a great love for my country and I am still able to criticize it. Let’s not praise it like we are unable to do anything wrong.

When I say I’m a Feminist

I try my best to be intersectional but we all have our own blinders on due to our own perspectives shaped by the people in our lives and our own developed knowledge. 

When I say I’m a Feminist

It’s because of all the women that I’ve met and had around me my whole life. The ones who work painstakingly and get barely any credit. Their opinions are questioned at every level by men and women, often more than their male counter-parts. Their ways of life are questioned. If a woman doesn’t want a child, or if she does and wants to work, or she stays home with the child. No matter what we choose, there’s someone behind a keyboard criticizing us for just trying to live our lives authentically to who we are individually. 

Women that like to cook, or women that don’t cook or clean. Because you know that’s what women are supposed to do and we’re supposed to clean until things look spotless but you know it’s an option for the guy because he’s the stereotypical breadwinner. If he’s not the breadwinner we judge that too. 

For gay couples that want to adopt children or go through invitro, etc. Their an abomination? But yet their taking children that they technically have no obligation to into their homes and lives to give them a more enriched life. Wow, how fucking terrible. 

When I say I’m a Feminist

I say it for the guys who don’t want to be hyper masculine either. I see you and I may not understand your struggle exactly. But I feel it at times when I joke about being an alpha and guys laugh at me as if that’s not a possible thing for a woman to be. 

I say it for the guys who think they have to pay for everything and when I offer to pay they shrivel up in fear as if that’s something terrible for a woman to offer a man. 

Finally

When I say I’m a Feminist

It’s for all the women and men who show up, who listen to me and also allow me to listen to them. All the women and men (people, also trans/gender fluid) that are just trying to be their own authentic selves. 

It’s for all the women in my life that are so amazing, beautiful, but also intelligent individuals yet some people are too prideful to admit. 

It’s for all the women that have to play coy when a guy flirts with them so they can ease away from an awkward situation. Or the women who are bold enough to speak up and risk a potential conflict that shouldn’t happen when someone speaks up for themselves.

It’s for men who fell into these situations with women they don’t want to get involved with (because they should want advances from any woman right?)

It’s for a love of all people

Anyone that feels like an other, generally not included.

Meet your Feminist

N. Oliva

#ArtTuesday – Women and Girl’s Clothing Choices’ for Spring and Summer Months

#ArtTuesday – Women and Girl’s Clothing Choices’ for Spring and Summer Months

It seems as the spring has come, the questioning of what girls wear to keep themselves cool/i.e.: not sweaty, has risen.

As a woman who was bothered by these dress codes while I was in high school, it worries me that girls are bothered for what they wear to protect guys, instead of teaching guys how to control themselves.

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Image shared via Facebook originally from Explore Talent. Questions whether the legitimacy of the girl who shared these fliers around her school. Of course she is right #respect #allwomen #allgirls **The Gaff Blog does not own this image**

The poster of this image on Facebook: Explore Talent – Acting and Modeling, questions if the girl was right with her reasoning for posting these fliers around her school. Well I say the girl is absolutely right.

Do not teach girls and women that their appearance is what matters most. In the long run, when you bother girls for not having shorts that are a length that matches with the end of their finger tips not only are you singling them out, but also you are shaming them for their choice in what to wear. You are ruining an individual’s identity.

This is not to say that there is not such a thing as inappropriate dress. One should not wear anything similar to the size of a bathing suit to a school. That is logical. High school/ school in general is not a beach or your house. So bathing suits and slippers should stay in your house. And I understand if clothes are see-through or too short to cover ass cheeks. However, why is it a problem for people like myself to wear shorts to keep themselves cool?

I have been singled out in the past for this reason. My arms are a whole lot longer than most girls. I never pass the finger tip length test.

That test is bullshit

My sister works for Con Edison, and their dress code (along with the shoes they have to wear to protect themselves while on the job) is clearly told to every worker (and a uniform is given) before they begin their work when they are hired.

The same logic and reasoning should be applied to school, and anywhere else that enforces a dress code.

Even when a uniform is not handed out, if you need to make a diagram/picture of what is acceptable versus not acceptable then make it.

Decency is a thing. But do not demean a girl and her self-esteem for wearing shorts!

To end this Art Tuesday post, I say:

Respect girls and women for their choice of apparel to keep themselves cool in the spring and summer months, as long as it is suited for the environment that they are staying. While I understand that there are guidelines for certain workplaces, these rules should be stated outright to everyone including men and women.

I’ll let a post from Tumblr officially end this one 😛

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When a girl walks in… RESPECT HER #respectgirls #respectwomen #respecteveryone #respecteverybody Found image via my facebook feed, post made through Tumblr **The Gaff Blog does not own this image**

***Update*** Found this picture on my instagram feed from a page called freethep (a group in the UK that supports making women’s sanitary napkins/pads/tampons free to all women). I thought it could not be more related to this post and the point I was asserting.

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**Image taken from instagram. The Gaff Blog does not own this image**

**The Gaff Blog Does Not Own Any Images Shared in This Post ** 

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